Outside Reading Post 6 (Q2)

By the end of the novel we have seen a complete revolution in the character of James Frey. After writing a reflection of his past, and then confessing to a priest, he is released from the clinic. As soon as he leaves, he tells his brother, Bob, and his brother’s friend Kevin, to take him to a bar. He asks his brother for forty dollars and buys a pint of whiskey. Upon receiving the whiskey Frey examines it carefully. He puts his fingers in it, smells it, and stares at his reflection in it. Ultimately, Frey tells the bartender to pour the whiskey out. Frey writes: “I touched it and I smelled it and I felt it, but I didn’t drink it. I’m done drinking. Won’t ever do it again” (430). Frey’s action, and resistance to the alcohol, shows that Frey has finally overcome  his addiction to alcohol. It reveals to us that James Frey’s strength and determination paid off.

The last page of the book gave a short list of what happened to the people mentioned throughout the book. The majority of the patients in the clinic died, including Lilly, who committed suicide, and Frey’s friend Leonard. The very last sentence of the novel tells us that James Frey has remained sober to this day. It simply states: “James has never relapsed” (432). Frey’s ability to remain clean even after all of this time since he has been at the clinic, shows us that it is possible to change our ways. Frey started off as someone who was given only a short time to live if he did not change. He ended as someone who successfully became, and remained, sober. 

Outside Reading Post 5 (Q2)

Further along James Frey's journey to recovery we see how much he has changed, and learn about his values, as he has to make a tough decision. Frey is faced with the decision of whether to leave the clinic and chase after Lilly, or stay there and focus on his own needs. Lilly has run away after hearing that she and Frey cannot see each other anymore. Frey remembers Lilly and his conversation about suicide and decides it is more important to run after her. He states "I stand at my door hoping she'll come back, hoping this is all a nightmare, hoping for the sake of hoping"(339). These words show Frey’s strong desire to help Lilly, and how much he has grown to love her. It seems now as if Frey needs Lilly in his life above everything else. Frey again states: “I love her and love is more important than Rules and Regulations” (340). These words are what empower Frey to go after Lilly. These words show that he finally has something in his life worth living for and someone he can love. By placing Lilly above all else we see that Frey has learned to accept others needs ahead of his own. Frey is faced with a tough ethical decision, to take care of his own needs, or another’s. We will all be faced with a similar decision at one point or another and we will have to make a choice just as Frey did.

  In addition to his love for Lilly, we see another change in the character of James Frey. It is something he has worked on throughout the book, but we are finally able to see a very dramatic change. Upon finding out that his Grandfather was an alcoholic he says: “If an individual is fat but wants to be thin, it is not a genetic disease. If someone is stupid, but wants to be smart, it is not a genetic disease. If a drunk is a drunk, but doesn't want to be a drunk anymore, it is not a genetic disease. Addiction is a decision” (308). This quote shows that Frey understands his mistakes, and blames no one else for them. He will not make any excuses for his actions, which shows us he has a great level of maturity. Again Frey shows his acceptance to us: “I did everything I did. I made the decisions to do it all. The only way I’m going to get better is if I accept responsibility for the decision to either be an Addict or not be an addict” (306). This shows that not only does Frey realize that where he is now is because of his own actions, but it also shows he understands what he must to do to help heal himself. 

Outside Reading Post 4 (Q2)

As the Frey accounts his experiences we see him continue to struggle with self-identity. He also has to struggle with decisions that may affect his future.  One of the major trends in the character of James Frey is that he has trouble following the rules. He started drinking and smoking pot at the age of ten, well knowing that it was illegal. He continues having trouble following the rules as he is not allowed to have interest in anyone at the treatment center. He ignores this as he spends increasingly more time with Lilly after their first secret meeting (in the last post).

            We now see the how role of Lilly becomes even more important in the novel. As Frey falls in love with Lilly he has less of a problem dealing with his withdrawal. He uses Lilly as a “replacement addiction.” It seems, however, that they both are relying on one another. They are supplying one another’s need for human understanding. We see the character’s similarities and need for one another as time goes on. They both continue as if they are inexperienced in matters of love, and as though they are both extremely fragile. Frey shows his improved understanding of relationships, he says: “Lilly needs to talk about her feelings about her worries about her fears. I let her. I encourage her. I listen to her” (290). This quote shows that Frey is more aware of human needs and more open to taking care of them.

            Again we see how Frey is becoming more gentle with the feelings of those around him. After a meeting with his parents, Frey hugs them. He describes the situation: “I step forward, put one of my arms around each of them, and they each put one of their arms around me. We pull each of us pulls and we hug each other the three of us hug each other it is strong and easy and full of something maybe love” (308). This is a very profound quote as Frey uses the word love, to describe an emotion he may have. To go from pushing away when his parents hug him, to actually being able to hug them on his own, and say it is easy, shows a great change in James Frey.  Frey struggles on with his emotions and self-identity but so far we have seen immense changes in his character, giving us a hope for his future that was not always there. 

Outside Reading Post 3 (Q2)

 During these next pages in A Million Little Pieces we see even greater changes beginning to take place within Frey. We see how he now has a stable group of people he sits and talks with. This is an improvement over his earlier behavior, where he would not be near or open with anyone. Frey writes: “I don’t want any more, but it doesn’t matter. I take bite after bite, I feel worse and worse. Get me something. Fill me. That is all that matters. Fill me” (106). These actions are before Frey begins to interact with other people. This is an important step for Frey on his journey seeking self identity. Later we see how at their lunch table, there is much joking and laughing. Frey notes: “It feels good to laugh” (250).

            As time goes on we read about Frey’s interest in Lilly, a woman received treatment at the facility he is at. It shows us how much he trusts her, as he even spills some of his secrets, and is very open with her. Frey tells his parents: “There are a lot of Rules here. I try to follow most of them, but this Girl, her name is Lilly, has been good for me. She’s cool, she’s smart, she listens to me, I listen to her, we understand each other. We’re different and we come from different places, but in a lot of ways we’re the same. We’re both wrecked, we’re both trying to get better. We both need help and we’re trying to help each other” (288). Frey’s profound words show not only his acceptance of his problems, but his complete change in attitude. From not wanting anyone to help him, to now letting someone into his life, Frey has made an important decision on his journey to recovery. I think that his relationship with Lilly may lead him off his path and he will be faced with a difficult choice to make in the future, that will test his strength and his ethics. 

OTW Post

The film On The Waterfront the characters each have their own opinions on the difference between traitors and whistle blowers, just as in All My Sons. The character of Ann is one that believes a person should stand up against wrong and corrupt things in society. We see her struggles as she tries to convince other characters in the film of this, especially Terry. The character of Terry is one who does not want to be a part of the corruption, yet he won’t take action to stop it or remove himself from it. The main members of the mob, who are taking part in the illegal activities, all believe that there is no such thing as a whistle blower. They think that anyone who would stand up against them is simply a traitor. These men take violent actions to make this clear to the possible whistleblowers.

Although it is a tough decision, whether to alert others when something is wrong, I think it is something that has to be done. It becomes even more of one’s duty to do so when there are people getting hurt because of the wrong doings. I feel that Terry, and all of the other men that know about the corruption, have the responsibility to share what information they know. Without these whistleblowers corruption will only continue, and will most likely grow worse. I feel that no matter how hard it may be to stand up and go against the others, especially when one is threatened, it is imperative that one do so. 

Response to AMS Question

In the play the characters have varying opinions on whether family or society is more important. The characters of Joe Keller (father) and Kate (mother) seem so think that actions should benefit their family over their society. Both of these parental figures feel that their actions must be done out of sacrifice for their family. Joe tries to tell us that the only reason he sent the cylinder heads out was for his family. He and Kate are talking:

                        Mother: Joe, Joe…it don’t excuse it that you did it for the family.

                        Keller: It’s got to excuse it!

                        Mother: There’s something bigger than the family to him.

                        Keller: Nothin’ is bigger! (77)

The quote shows that Joe thinks family comes first, and in this situation Chris and Kate disagree. Kate doesn’t believe that Joe’s reasons justify his actions, but she believes her reasons justify her own actions. She tries to tell us that we all must keep believing that Larry will return, even if she knows it’s no longer true, even if it means denying the truth to the benefit of her family. Ann and her discuss the deaths caused by the cracked cylinder heads:

                        Ann:..And how do you know Larry wasn’t one of them?

                        Mother: I was waiting for that. As long as you’re here, Annie, I want to ask you to never say that again.

                        Ann: You surprise me. I thought you’d be mad at him.

                        Mother: What your father did had nothing to do with Larry. Nothing.

                        Ann: but we can’t know that.

                        Mother: As long as you’re here! (31).

Kate’s words reveal to us that deep inside, she knows that Larry could have been killed by a plane sent out by Joe, but she protects the family and refuses to admit it.

            I think that this is the fine line between when it is appropriate to put the needs of your family before society. Upon reflection I see that there is often not a “right” and “wrong.” In general, I believe  that you must make choices that will benefit your family, unless in hurts others in society. If you can make these decisions causing damage to society, then it as an okay decision to continue with. In the case of Joe Keller I believe he made the wrong decision. He knew his decision could hurt society yet he sent out the cylinder heads anyways. This was a huge risk because, not only did it kill 21 people, but it also tore apart their family. His plan backfired on him, showing us that a decision for our family may not be the best decision, especially if it hurts society in the process. 

Outside Reading Post 2 (Q2)

The further along I move into the book the more I see James Frey’s unique writing techniques. He often swears which suprisingly adds to the development of his character. I am interested to see if by the end of the book he changes his ways and does not swear as often. Again we see we Frey’s opposition to openly expressing emotions. He is talking to someone whom he refers to as “Old man” at a clinic. Frey writes: “Come here, I’m gonna give you a hug. I stay where I am. I agreed to twenty-four hours. That doesn’t mean I’m hugging you and that doesn’t mean we’re friends. He laughs again, steps forward, puts his arms around me, hugs me. All you got to do is try. I pull away”(109). It furthers the argument, proving to us it is not that he just has something against his parents (from my last post), he does not want a relationship with anyone.

Another character trait of James Frey is revealed to us. He provides insight by saying: “I’ve destroyed, another thing I can’t fix or bring back, another beautiful thing ruined by my carelessness. I don’t stop. I don’t stop destroying and I don’t change my course and I don’t look back. Looking back hurts too much, so I just keep going”(116). Frey’s words show us that he knows the damage he has been causing, he realizes it, he accepts it, and he knows it is real. Hopefully he will come to a point where he sees that it has to stop and he must eventually change his ways, instead of continuing as he does now. I think that this foreshadows a change that will soon take place in James Frey.